When depression strikes, I can feel a very distinct sense of tearing. The outburst of depressive emotions releases long-suppressed negativity, making me feel disappointed and despondent. Still, another part of me clearly reminds me that I can’t be like this, which makes me feel conflicted and even more painful. I hope someone can understand my feelings and give me support. Yet at the same time, I push away those who genuinely want to help me, as if I’m afraid, afraid that the more I rely on them, the more painful it will be when I lose them.
When I’m in a depressive state, I try my best not to let others see that I’m someone with too many negative emotions, perhaps fearing they will avoid me once they know, or simply not wanting to affect others’ lives. For these predicaments, all I can do is accept, accept the fact that I’m depressed, accept others’ opinions of me, and accept myself during depression, which doesn’t feel like me but is still me. At the same time, I don’t see myself as unique, and I don’t get caught up in my emotions.
Thanks to recent science propagation about depression, more people have come to understand the difficulties faced by those with depression, and most are willing to lend a hand, especially those who have experienced this pain and are willing to help other depressed patients. What people with depression need is just a little care, and that’s enough.
In the end, the ultimate interpretation of depression lies in the hands of society and the public. The diagnosis of depression depends on the assessment of the patient’s behavior and emotions. What is considered “normal” is just the mainstream view of society. In the oldest mental hospital in Europe, “Bethlem Royal Hospital,” those locked up included not only the mentally ill but also many poor people, eccentric individuals, those who opposed the old order, and those who opposed traditional ideas like male superiority and female inferiority. By modern standards, they are not mentally ill, but in the eyes of most people at the time, they were no different from the mentally ill. So people’s general understanding of mental illness can change, and the misunderstandings and stereotypes about people with depression are all feeble excuses, not worth discussing much.
Everyone who is deeply depressed has a story hidden deep within, a story that no one else knows. If you are willing, you can tell me this story. I won’t persuade you, and it’s hard for me to persuade you to turn back. But your life has always lacked a listener, and if you can, I am willing to be that listener.
- Anonymous
China
Gabriel｜Content curator
Rebecca｜Editor
Yingying Dai｜Translator
Comments