I have been working for three years. I found a job after I graduated from Secondary Six. After the exams, he got a job as a script writer, which he did for three years. This is my main job, and I also did some board game related work this year. I like some types of reasoning. When I was looking for a job, I actually wanted to find some work related to board games, and then I just saw a script killing company when I looked online. He hired me to be a screenwriter, which is to write a script or edit something. And then secretly loved writing them.
In addition to my job, I also did volunteer work at a youth center. I also have a long-term plan with the social worker. I spent a lot of time at the youth center, and I've known the people there since I was a kid. I did a lot of activities when I was a kid, and they were all fun. But you have to be 12 years old to do anything volunteer, so after I was 12 years old, I started to work with social workers and organize a lot of different activities. I started volunteering in junior high because helping others made me feel valuable. I grew up in this environment, so I think I can do it.
By the time I got to college, I started doing some long and complex projects. I have been working on a project called "Failure Exhibitions" for three years, which are exhibited at schools and major events. The failed exhibition was originally because they wanted to move the location, so they wanted to do a big event called "15; 16 ". The theme is to express that the age of 15 or 16 is when we start a new chapter, using semicolons to indicate that it is not over yet. At that time, social workers gathered a lot of young people and said that they would do similar exhibitions. We looked at a lot of different sources at that time. Later, I saw that Sweden had done a "failure exhibition". It started out as a technology exhibition, showing some failed inventions, and we thought failure was fun. The original intention is to express that failure is an ordinary thing through personal stories, there is no need to put a big failure, and there will always be ups and downs in daily life. We wanted others to read it with some resonance, so there was an autograph book next to each story. In this semi-interactive way, let the other person understand that even in the low times, there will be other people to understand or accompany him. Story is a more important element, because our team feels that story is something that cannot be denied, because it is something that has been experienced by others and is unique. So we can't deny or change his story, we can only accept and understand it.
I was impressed by a story about a person in the team, a girl who loves to laugh, has a strong ability to work, and takes good care of others. Hearing her story blew my mind. She was bullied in elementary school, and then in middle school she thought she could get out of it and start over. But because she didn't go to the orientation day, when she first started school, others were already in groups, so she felt a little lonely at that time. Then she had no friends for a whole school year, and her classmates were unkind to her. Then she went to a leadership event, met new people, and had a fresh start. But then there was an event, looking for a host, and finally two people were selected, only she and another girl. Finally, the responsible teacher came to her and said that she was not suitable, you usually always laugh, feel that she is not so serious and will not work seriously. How did she know the teacher was thinking this way because the teacher said to another girl that day, "Rest assured, I will definitely choose you, not her." And the girl was actually right there. She heard it. She was quite shocked at the time, she did not do anything, usually very hard to work. But I haven't laughed so much since then. After graduation, teachers would still say that about her. In fact, the girl also wanted to prove herself at the beginning, and participated in those exercises of the troupe. The teacher told her that it was good to join the club, suitable for this kind of entertainment. We hear that we feel sad for her, because you see her now, and then imagine her past experience, can not imagine how can still really love to smile. At that time, because I was responsible for writing everyone's story, I remember that I gave her an article opening sentence, which was: I will not let my smile become the tone of others attacking me.
We worked on this exhibition for more than half a year, and then the day of the official exhibition was at Jao Tsung-i Cultural Center. Not many people actually come, because it's probably a remote place. But that day I remember our first guest, who had come from the mainland to do an exhibition for charity. When he saw the exhibition, he said that he thought it was very interesting, and asked if we would do it in other places, and whether we would be interested in going to the mainland to do it. I can only write it down because it's so far away.
Then, a year later, the project was revived. The first time we did it, we didn't have a lot of confidence that we would do a good job, but on the day of the official exhibition, there were a lot of people who came to us and asked us "Will you do another exhibition in the future?" We started the second episode, we went to the Nanfeng cotton factory to do an exhibition, with some new team. We recently went to a secondary school to hold an exhibition, in fact, I think it is a rare thing to enter the school, because in Hong Kong, failure is a topic that is not very acceptable, most people only talk about success, they do not want to hear about failure. So most schools reject it, they don't understand why they have to tell stories about negative things. When we heard that some schools wanted us to do an exhibition, it was a surprise to us, because it felt like something was starting to change, and our exhibition was finally changing some people's minds. So it was an important opportunity for us at the school.
Being a social worker doesn't have that much security, because it depends on the benefits and conditions of the organization itself, or how the boss treats you. If you're talking about internal benefits, no, it's a normal job. However, you can add up your leave and take a month off at once. Sometimes it is like being a clerk in the office, because he has more sudden situations as a social worker, and sometimes he really needs to be on standby like a doctor. I feel a lot of pressure as a social worker. There are always unexpected situations. When we are in contact with children, we are more happy. At other times, we often have to face unhappy things, such as the emotional problems of the elderly or various contradictions in the family, which also affect our own mood and let us see a lot of unpleasant things that we do not want to see. Because the government will feel that it is unnecessary and will not understand why it needs so many resources to pay attention to the psychology of others. Other people say things, and they feel like social workers can't do much. Because social workers are less likely to take the initiative to find others, they are mainly passive, and others come to them. So people who really need it don't go straight to a social worker. The help of social workers is also limited, because whether people can change their minds through chatting is certainly not something that can be done in the short term.
When I was in junior high, we had carnivals, amusement parks. At that time, I remember that each booth would be stamped with a stamp, and five stamps could be exchanged for gifts. I remember a seemingly older man who came over to play and complained about why he didn't just give gifts. At that time, remember that I shared this sentence with my friends and complained to my friends. In fact, as volunteers, we also have to manage order and deal with a lot of things, which is not easy. Because in fact, the game is also about meeting and planning, and I don't decide the rules of the game. I think he was calling me that when he complained. It was supposed to be a small thing, but then he came back a few hours later, pointing at us and swearing. He said what you just said, he said it was not to scold me. We were all there, and suddenly a few hours later you came and scolded us. I remember the guy telling the social worker to control your people and being scared because the guy was taller and bigger. And then when I got home, I told my dad, and he told me that when you do these things, you only meet this person once, and you just leave him alone. I don't care if he complains. Then I learned my lesson. This is an experience I don't like very much.
I think that my tolerance and my responses as a social worker is heavily influenced by my personality as a child. I was a bit of a "princess" when I was small and wanted to be first in everything; then seeing other classmates acting the way I did, I realized that I didn't like that part of myself. I wanted to change that side, so I tried hard to be agreeable, thinking that the more I helped others, the more people would like me. By the time I got to high school, I began to feel disconnected from my emotions: I was often unable to say no to others and never got mad. Even unreasonable requests didn't bother me much, though I knew, logically, that they were unfair. When I do volunteer work, for example, I have a low tolerance and don’t get upset when I meet someone who isn’t nice to me. As time went by, I learned that being a volunteer doesn’t make me opinionless and forces me to conceal my emotions. Just because I’m a social worker doesn’t mean that I can’t express my own thoughts.
I remember when I was in middle school, there was a carnival event, and we were in charge of one of the booths that would give out stamps and allow visitors to redeem a prize. There was an older gentleman that casually came over to play our booth, and then complained that we didn’t directly give out prizes. I shared his comment with a friend and felt really irritated, since it felt like he was scolding me, though I had no control over the rules of the game. At first, this was an insignificant matter, but after a few hours, he came back to our stall and started pointing and cursing at us, accusing us of saying bad remarks. We were quite shocked - it had been hours since we last saw him. I even remember the man reporting us to the social worker, stating that we should be “better supervised”. It was a really scary moment, because he was much taller and bigger than we were. After the event, I talked to my dad and he told me that when these things happen, we would probably never see these people again, so we should simply ignore them. Even when people complain about you, it’s not worth getting mad or upset. That upsetting experience taught me to be more discreet and keep a quiet voice.
Now I will start to analyze my inner thoughts, wondering whether I am really happy to do volunteer work in these years. It's not every day, but volunteering makes me feel like I have something to contribute. One of the reasons I still want to volunteer is because I feel that helping others and having people say thank you when I talk to them makes me feel valuable. Another reason is that although I didn't learn everything, I felt like I learned a lot every time I volunteered. Now I feel like I volunteer to see more, from seeing others to seeing myself. I didn't have many ideas before, and I felt that I was safe, and I felt that other people were helped. For example, the old people's home, needless to say a lot of things, sit down with them for a while, it feels like it has helped them. But if it is now, I will feel that going to activities can chat with others, can play with others, and listen to other people's stories, which is also good for me. I used to be more consequentialist, but now it's not just me doing these things, it's more what I want to get out of these activities. What I find most rewarding is that after a long time, suddenly someone, whether it's a parent or a child, comes to you and says, "Oh, I remember you used to spend time with me or my son at the event." At that time, I had a great sense of accomplishment. I was remembered by others because I was particularly good or bad, and their initiative to say hello must be a particularly good reason. So I'll be happy to hear it. In addition, sometimes in the lecture speech, after sharing, some people will praise or think that I have done a good job, feel a sense of accomplishment, is the feeling of being recognized by others.
- Fish Hong Kong
Interviewer | Katie + William
Editor | Jasmine
Translator | Kendy
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